1. No helmet on dude
2. No helmet on DAUGHTER
3. White visor always fashion faux pas
4. Midgrade 28c more than standard
5. Midgrade called “Silver”
6. Front tire low
7. Back tire flat
8. Seat too low
9. Cellphone use while riding
10. Flip flops

(Picture from Associated Press.)

More troubling than the pure gooey grah of such exposes is the viewer feedback on such hard-hitting journalistic glories. Skimming the comments, we have the usual cast of characters:

• Cyclists don’t pay for roads and facilities and should show more gratitude to all those people who do pay for them by using them and staying out of the way. I’ve commented on this previously. Hey, the 7 bikes in our garage weren’t free, and we didn’t steal them either.
• Related silliness: It would be so much safer if we had mandatory sidepath rules or allowed sidewalk riding. (Note: commenter doesn’t call it a mandatory sidepath rule, but that’s what a cycling advocate would call several of the commenter proposals).
• Usual insertion of rants that cyclists ‘obstruct’ vehicular traffic. Bicycles ARE vehicles under state code! The interpretation being given by the intrepid commenter on said statute is that even when following the rules, bicycles impede traffic and thus are in violation of 169.222, section 4c.

There are a number of quality comments, such as the observation that Minneapolis bicycle paths are 10mph zones (and in mostly dreadful shape), and pointing out that while ignoring signals is both illegal and dumb, use of a lane and use of a road is fully legal in Minnesota. Even some of the cyclists, though, are espousing the bicycle as chiefly a toy that should be used in ‘play areas’ (aka paths), rather than considering steps towards traffic calming and vehicular cycling.

Many League Cycling Instructors discuss the need not just for cyclist education, but for better education for ALL road users. Comments like the ones on the ‘news’ story cited above emphasize it. The only question I have is if there’s an openness to learning, or if an attempt to teach will just drive these people to further bile?

With that comes a deluge of people asking: “What bike should I buy?” I end up answering that a lot for friends, relatives, random co-workers who see the picture of me and my husband on bikes I have in my office and who have heard rumors that I’m some sort of biker person.

I think my answers frustrate some, because they want me to tell them to go to a specific place, and buy a specific brand and model. Of course, it’s not that easy. Questions need to be answered.

What kind of riding do you intend to do? Be honest with yourself.

• Are you looking to do short bike commutes to work?
• Paved street and trail riding?
• Charity events?
• Off-road and unpaved journeys?
• Do you want to be able to haul a Burley? A trail-a-bike?

Figuring out HOW you plan to use the bike is key. A few years ago, I helped a friend find a bike. He saw the sort of riding my club did, and wanted to join in. He liked the idea of a fitness activity that wasn’t murder on the knees. So we found him a good road bike, suitable for group rides, with the best possible frame that would fit him, and components worth using… but easily upgraded. Six years later, he’s still riding that frame, and has rebuilt most of the bike several times.

A lot of people get hung up on brand. Brand is irrelevant. If the frame doesn’t fit, the brand won’t matter. Every brand has its own merits and geometry. Pick one that fits your body and budget.

As a rule of thumb, the frame is going to be what makes or breaks the whole bicycle purchase experience. if you buy a frame that sucks or doesn’t fit, you won’t ride the bike. Period. Getting good components is a nice plus, but on most bikes, you can upgrade them later. If you use the bike enough, they’ll need replacement someday anyway – parts wear out on bikes, just like they do on cars.

Depending on your intended use, you’ll need different features of the frame and components. The second biggest mistake I see people make, after getting a frame that doesn’t fit, is getting the wrong wheels/tires. Most people are using their bikes on paved streets and trails. They will want a smoother tire. However, many get big knobby mountain-style tires thinking they’ll be better. Actually, on pavement, they slow you down a lot. Other people get sleek race-style wheels because they ‘look cool,’ but may be meaning to use their bike much more casually, and have little experience in wheel maintenance. Low-spoke, sleek race wheels require more care and maintenance than many are going to want to put in or learn.

Another thing I see is people messing up seat choice. The seat on a bike at purchase is always negotiable. However, it’s not always true that the biggest, plushest seat will be the most comfortable. Seat choice is going to depend a lot on your riding position (upright? traditional road?) and your actual tuckus. Many people are awfully surprised when they find that something without massive padding makes their butt happiest. (And early on, ANY seat is going to create a bit of post-ride ow – you have to break in both your butt and your seat!)

Most of them needed to raise their seats. I am increasingly convinced, solely through anecdotal evidence, that more people need to check their seat height.

When your bike seat is too low, you don’t get extension of the leg. This is missed power on the downstroke. It also tires the legs faster. When a seat is at the right height, you get more power from less work. It’s awesome.

Some people worry about knee over-extension. As the queen of premature knee arthritis, I assure you this is not the case. The seat should be high enough to fully extend your leg without locking the knee. No knee lock = no overextension.

Even if you’re aware of seat height, like me, it’s good to check it regularly. On many bikes, seat posts can ‘sink’ with use. Just check the height before taking off every time.

Try it. Really. Trust me.

Bicycle, originally uploaded by Days Between Stations.

On this bicycle in Amsterdam, note the integrated front-end carrier. Most people use them for small children, although they seem handy for grocery runs too.

Mind you, I know not from experience of having man-issues of such nature, but because, hey: It’s been all over the bike press for years and every saddle manufacturer has a saddle to allegedly solve the problem.

Harvard’s helpful hints are… well, not novel, to say the least:

Wear padded biking shorts.

Oooh. Good thing manufacturers are already seizing the day with that one.

Position the seat to reduce pressure: Make sure it is not so high that your legs are fully extended at the bottom of your pedal stroke, and don’t tilt the seat up.

Any LCI could tell you this one, so long as they mean ‘don’t lock your knees on the bottom of the pedal stroke,’ and not ‘do the grampa bike thing where you knee yourself in the beer gut on every stroke!’

Change your position and take breaks during long rides.

A good idea no matter what your plumbing, if for no other reason that on a long ride, you’d best hydrate and eat, and if you hydrate enough, you’re going to need a few pauses to refresh, as it were.

If you feel tingling or numbness in the penis, stop riding for a week or two.

Again, I can’t speak from personal experience, but I’d think if you own the equipment, this would be obvious.

Why do I think they got fat cash from some endowment to tell us these things?